Sarah's hand trembled as she held the flask up to the sunlight. There would be no more pain, no more tears. there would be no more fear no more loveless nights and hopeless days. The liquid shone amber in the eligantly shaped flask. It's deadly contents Sliding easily as Sarah turned the stopper and poped the cork free. No one would be able to harm her again, she would be free to travel as she wanted in this life and the next.

Only a few drops would surfice, more than that and she would be nolinger among the living and probibly wouldn't give a fig wether people cryed for her or not.

She brought the mouth of the flask closer to her lips, inhailing the sweet smell of her escape. she had never tryed this before but she had heard of it being done and read about the unusual properties of the plant that the elixur was made of. it had the ability to bring on the semblance of death, for a while anyway. too much was fatal and too little would just make you sleep for a bit.

She had to do this, she had to escape her pain some how and this was the best way she could think of. better than running away, which would only cause her to be hunted down by her brothers. True they did love her very much but they were helpless in this. she couldn't just stick it out because she would surely find herself rather startilingly dead after a few years of tolerating it. no this was the best way. The priest had said that he would help her by secreting her body away in the night. so that she would not find that they had embalmed her while her body lay in a comatose state.

she touched the lip of the flagon to her lips and hesitated. fear gripping her hard, what was the matter with her, she had prepaired herself for the risks, she had baide farewell to her brothers and had arranged for her father to find her body.

She clenched her fist and allowed two drops to touch her tonge. The liquid tingled as the drug started to take effect almost imediately. She sighed and looked down where her body lay. peaceful. It's eyes closed and a slight smile on her face. the flask lay shattered on the floor not far away.

Fear made her cold, but for the silver strand attached to her body through her heart. and a bright light surrounding the figure on the ground. It was then that the door opened, causing her to look up. There stood her father, a peculiar look on his face. as if he were actualy going to have a heart attach. a gutteral noise escaped his lips. Sarah could almost see his heart tearing, and she was sorry for that, she cryed as he fell to the floor, crawling to her prone body, and gentaly cradling her limp form.

Suddenly he gave a gutteral scream, rocking backwards and forward, tears rushing down his face in a mannor that Sarah had never seen before. His cry brought the rest of the household rushing through the door. Sarah shivered and shook as she realised the depth of pain she had caused. the wounds that might never heal she saw appearing on her family's faces. The one brother she had dare include in her planes looked angry and betrayed, and he too cryed. Real tears, nothing was faked, he couldn't fake his greif. Because he knew this would be the last he ever saw of her.

Sarah suddenly knew bitterness as she watched those that had in their hearts loved her, while in the world showed nothing but contempt for the girl who was thought to not be her fathers child. The girl they were going to give in marrage to a man who was cruel and mad.

This is a good story LR. If the truth be known of what really happens to those who make this choice they would never try to take their own life. Unfortunately, most do not get a second chance to make things right. It is not a glamorous thing to do and people are not happier. I know people who were given a second chance and they do all they can to help people understand.

One of our own did not get a second chance. The trauma and problems created for those left wondering, far outway any real or imagined problems that cause the deed in the first place.

Loved ones are left wondering and hurting forever.

There was a flash of light bright and wonderous and suddenly she was within her own body again. The Priest sat by her side, a frown on his face. The chill of the Preperation chamber seemed to seep into her very soul. Around him was a shimmering light, colors insinuated them selves in and about him. Sarah could tell he was ill, just not admitting it to him self yet. A dark and ugly splotch was hovering around his chest. He blinked as he realised that she was awake and tears formed in his eyes. He had been certain that she had overdosed herself on that stuff. He cursed himself for ever even thinking of encouraging such a dangerous idea. He sighed, but he couldn't have stood by and watched this vibrant young girl marry an evil man like Sherrif Bailt. It wouldn't have been right no matter how it would have profited the family.

He got up and checked her pulse, the paralysis would last another few minutes and then she would be able to start her journey. though she would feel like death warmed over untill tomorrow when the drug would have worked completely out of her system. HE glanced at the packs by the door and a warm cloaks hanging on nails above them. He had requested a leave of absince and had the request approved by the bishiop who had heard of the plan through confession. He had Required that the priest who had encouraged the girl, made sure that she would fair well on her journey. Officialy it his absence was to be one of prayer and faith. Which it would be in it's own little way. He sighed as he watched her begin to twitch and groan. Her coffin would be filled with rocks and she would be on her way by evening.

They would head around the mountains and down to the royal city of Plaegion. hopefully they would make the court before the deception was discovered. If it ever was discovered. Then the girl would be introduced to the court as the lady Leomhann, A relitive of the Count de Coursen. A man dead at least five years. Come in search of a Husband, since the Count had been her gaurdian and she had only recently been informed of his passing.

The priest smiled to himself as Sarah groaned and sat up rubbing the back of her neck. Yes this trip ought to be intresting. He had dreamed of such adventure in his youth and never actualy been able to set about in having one. Maybe that was why he had encouraged the girl.

The sound of sobbing came from the upright form on the stone slab. Alarmed he went to her and held her in his arms.

"what upsets you so My lady?" he asked consern for her coloured his voice. She looked at him, her eyes full of tormented sorrow.

"They were in such pain." she rasped out, her throat not yet used to working again. " I caused such pain."And her tears renewed, suddenly he felt sick inside. She now knew what pain could come from a selfish desire, would she change her mind?

With The blessing of the gods they had made it through the rugged peaks and deadly trails of the mountains. Sarah had been morose most of the journey. obeying without hesitation or comment when the going got roughe or when brigands were sighted.

The last part of the journey the priest had gotten heartily sick of being the only one talking or commenting on the splender that they passed. He went out of his way to bring a spark of joy back to her eyes, and as they moved out of the mountains, sarah did once again begin to speak. quietly and only of nessisary things. there was no joy in her eyes and the priest suspected that the pain still lingured from her escape. The trip through the mountains had only slightly lifted the deep depression from her mind.

He worried that she wouldn't be able to pull off the rouse that they needed to instigate. Her green eyes seemed suttered and her spirit hidden in the folds of sadness. He was starting to think that they would have to alter the story a smidgen. maybe she had been marryed and her husband died before the wedding could be consumated and the family tossing her out as useless... yes that might work.

Sarah, watched the priest out of the corner of her eye. HE was deep in thought and she knew it was because of her. he was a hansome man who was dedicated to his calling. She winced as that reminded her why he was walking beside her. It had been the biggest folly of her life. She had hurt not only her father but everyone surrounding them. Her mother had died in child birth, which was probibly the reason her father had been so cold towards her. she hung her head, her father had truely loved her mother and she had probily had reminded him of her. she had been selfish and stupid. The event she knew would never leave her, and she began to wonder if the sin of it would hound her forever.

Tripping on a large stone brought her back to her sences. The land about her was slowly changing from steep inclines and even steeper Downward slopes, to the gentle rolling of the foot hills. They topped a rise and looked down at a small town and fields as far as the river which she could trace down to the sea, And a Large city, thrice as large as The city of Anoveriter, her home....

Realising the possiblity of having a fly buzz into her mouth was quite high she snapped her mouth closed and hastily caught up with the priest. She had learned his fist name a while back, as they had rounded the courner of the first mountain vally they had come to. It had been Peter Massovic before he had taken his vows, now it was Brother Massovic to one and all.

Peter had stopped as they reached the first fence and shaded his eyes. he frowned, something was wrong with the village below. There was no children, livestock seemed to be wandering aimlessly. There even seemed to be a bit of smoke rising from the cop fields and some small cottage windows. The walls seemed broken down and neglected. Yes he decided something was deffinately wrong. the feeling of unease grew as he also spyed lumps of fabric lying on the road.

What could have happened in this small town so close to the capital.

It wasn't till, they had reached the town limits that they knew why this place looked like it did. there posted on a stone embedid on the road was a notice of plauge. A quarinteen of five years had been imposed on the village. but the quarinten had expired six months eairlier.

They carefully walked through the outskirts of town. looking about Sarah spotted one bundle of rags that wasn't blowing in the wind. infact it looked awfully like it was grinning at her. The closer she got the more convinced she was that the bundle of rags was actualy smiling, and winking too.

She placed a trembling hand on patricks arm. he stopped and looked in the direction she was looking. He paused then walked up to the rags.Held out his hands and lifted the old woman within them to her feet. she totered abit before stabilizing herself.